So, was a thrill when Matthew told me we were going to Spain? I mean, what is not to love? Wouldn´t be going back to you mother country the best scenario? You already know the language, you already understand the culture, even if you move to the other side of the country from your family, at least you are in the same country. You can go buy groceries from day one without translator. You don´t look different and neither do your kids. Why would I not be thrill? Still, I wasn´t.
Because as much as I knew that coming to Spain would make things a lot easier for everyone (of course when Matthew said Spain was the country was after being lead by God and not but all those “positive” things), still I knew lots about Spain. I knew about the apathy of the people towards God. The lack of interest on spiritual things. The hard hearts. The “we don´t want your church here” attitude.
And I always remember seeing the missionary presentations about places like Africa, where 100 people would get saved in one day. Still, I didn´t tell that to Matthew.
On our survey trip, two years later, God gave me a compassion for the people. It wasn’t that I didn´t have it before, it was just that I was being selfish. I look at their eyes, I saw that emptiness and I thought that once before I have had that emptiness in my eyes. Once before I have had that apathy towards spiritual things. But there I was then, and all because of the mercy of God, and because of the surrendering of a missionary. If I wasn´t willing to sacrifice for my people, how could I expect someone to.
And my heart changed, and I am not going to say it is always easy. Sometimes you feel like quitting. Sometimes you feel like there is never going to be a change. But on those times is when God reminds me where I came from.
Following God´s will is not always easy. It may come with difficulties. We may not be able to fully understand it. But who is wiser than God. And who loves us more than God.
His will is perfect.
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